Happily Ever After (My Wedding Ceremony)

START:
Crystyl walks down the aisle to: “Tenerife Sea” by Ed Sheeran (recording)

M: With an unconventional love, comes an unconventional twist – we ask our wedding parties and guests to please take a seat.

(Lights fade for the theater announcement – RECORDING)
“Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to tonight’s performance of “Happily Ever After – The True Story. Please note that any recording of this performance, either video or photograph is highly encouraged. This production is being professionally recorded for commercial distribution. If there are any children in the audience that are not fans of the performance, please remove them from the theater as soon as possible. If there are any adults in the audience who are not fans of the performance, be nice, or leave. Thank you, and enjoy the show.

C: Our love is not just an emotion we feel for each other, or acts that define our existence together.
M: No, our love is fact.
C: For reference, the definition of a fact is: a thing that is indisputably the case.
M: Weddings have been held for various reasons throughout the ages:
C: Joining of families
M: Politics
C: Money
M: Religion
C: But at it’s purest form, the idea of a wedding is to prove the existence, and commitment to
B: Love
M: Creation is most often found in the wake of necessity.
C: Our need to understand our corresponding definitions of “soul-mate” gave birth to an endless stream of theories and hypotheses.
M: But only one of enough magnitude adequate to do it justice proving that our love is not only feelings between two people, but instead, a fact.
C: Our Theory states that Living, Objects, have Vectors of Equilibrium (Sign Language for L-O-V-E) Abbreviation:
B:“Love” (both sigh in unison)

M: Looking backwards and forwards we became aware that our love lives on an unalterable timeline – that we are light colliding in a particle accelerator. We are the crossed paths of electrons that only when combined create a sense of harmony – not just within ourselves, but instead, lending balance to the universe itself.
C: Like all science we started at the beginning asking ourselves, how did this cosmic collision of creation and collective caring come to be?
M: Was it; “Fate” “Destiny” or “Serendipity”?
C: No. We call ours

B: “Curtis”

C: I remember the day I came to New York
M: I came to work
C: It was an amazing Friday
M It was just another Friday
C: “In New York, Concrete Jungle
M: that had me locked down in the office
C: Where dreams are made of
M: (Shoots crystyl a look)
C: (shoots mike a look while still singing) There’s nothing you can’t do
M: My work day droned on dull like any day before it, but this one was –
C: Special M: Different
M: I remember the first time we met.
C: It was October twenty fifth two thousand thirteen
M: It was right around (looks at watch) 4:00pm (Raises eyebrows and looks at audience)
C: There I was in NYC. The abundance of energy & excitement overshadowed the very buildings encasing it.
M: The shackles of the New York City hum-drum were at their tightest in the waning hours before the weekend.
C: One more friend to see on this journey
M: One more person to meet and I was done
C: I promised Curtis I’d stop by
M: I told Curtis I’d pop in
C: Then I saw him (Same time) M: Then I saw her (Same time)
M: Those shackles were now the only ties preventing me from getting lost in the brightening blue skies found neatly folded and safe in her eyes.
C: The energy of the city FROZZEEEE, it’s pulse stopped within the veins and arteries of it’s streets.
M: All movement stopped, flickered, and then as if every collective footstep constituted a piece of my heartbeat, the consciousness of the city erupted – I had to play it cool so
M: I asked (Same time) C: He asked (Same time)
M: So what’s your type…of music!
C: You… mean my favourite song? Genre? Artist?
M: I didn’t recall eating butterflies for breakfast (Rubs stomach) … I gave her a USB stick filled with music ranging from:
C: bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum I see a little silhouetto of a man, Scaramouch! Scaramouch!
M: and we do the fandango
C: thunderbolts and lightning
M: very very frightening me!
C; Galleleo
M: Galleleo
C: Galleleo, Figaro…….
M: To songs like:
C: All my ex’s live in Texas, that’s why I hang my hat in NYC
M: all the way to:
C: “- If I ruled the world, – oh
M: Imagine that –
C: I’d free all my sons, love love em baby
M: an eclectic mix whose heartbeat matched my own as I said goodbye and handed her
B: A business card? …
M: (with arms extended towards her)… With my number on the back… A small fact I failed to mention – a fact that was not discovered until Monday – a day 1,100 miles away…
C: The space between us was now diminished by the breaths and words we shared – which at this point were nonexistent. It didn’t “Occur” to me until Monday that I even had his number. And by “Occur” I mean:
B: Thank you Curtis!

M: That Monday night my excitement rode in at the speed of sound, my sonic boom was heard by all close enough to hear my phone play the theme to the Batman Cartoon as I received a text.
*Mike pretends to look at phone
C: (just her voice) – Hey, it was great meeting you, thanks again for the music!
M: The butterflies I ate 3 days ago coiled around my central nervous system and responded for me – playing it cool…

[cell phone ringing]

… was right out the window

C: Oh! (sounds surprised) Hey!?
M: Hey! (looks around like wtf am I doing?!) *Nervous Laugh*
C: and 3 words forged our path:
M: Got your text!
C: The next 3 words…
M: How are you?
C:Three over-used words whose commonplace melted away to reveal an uncommon breadth of depth. The question reflected like a diamond gathering it’s value and meaning from life’s special moments (points to ring)
M: And what started as the result of a breakfast I don’t even remember eating

B: Turned Into

M: Everything
C: (same) Every conversation’s beginning. “How are you?” – echoing a smile embodying concern and laced with love. And love, is so apparent – when people believe they are in “it’s” presence they always seem to ask some variation of the same question.
M: When did you know you were falling in love?
C: But people don’t realize that falling is
M: A Process
C: A Journey
B: Not a destination
C: Those questions
M: Those conversations
B: were our first steps
M: With each passing conversation our vectors became more and more aligned and real – no longer existing solely in a state of dreams.

(cue to start is “in a”)
C: I’ve been awake for a while now
You’ve got me feelin’ like a child now
‘Cause every time I see your bubbly face
I get the tingles in a silly place

It starts in my toes
And I crinkle my nose
Wherever it goes
I always know
That you make me smile
Please stay for a while now
Just take your time
Wherever you go

M: Our vectors like sun rays provided light to the very object of our desires
B: Love
C: Our conversations were as sunlight – though unaware of its continued impact, like light, our communication manifested into something (pause) measureable – our first weekend
M: …was going to be beautiful, perfect, and full of unexpected moments.
C: EXHIBIT A: Airport – Mike – Flowers and butterflies
M: First impressions are like lightning – Beautiful or Terrifying usually striking the same people only once, and hopefully not while they are covered in water. I was blessed to have two, and I was going to make them count.
C: EXHIBIT B: Our “First Date” was my very own genie’s lamp – I was granted 3 wishes – one for each day we got together. My first wish was to be surprised – a wish that was granted over and over – from our initial airport rendezvous to arriving at the hotel greeted by balloons, champagne, cupcakes and a handwritten card.
M: You’d be surprised how many people are willing to go out of their way to feel like they’re a part of Love.
C: I Loved it – it was like being The Bachelorette. Well, kind of, but with only one guy, who got all my date cards, and (dry) we weren’t being stalked by video cameras. My second wish was for great food – a wish that my mouth requested, but my stomach was not quite ready to be delivered.
M: I granted her second wish at our own hidden gem, Stanton Social. She wore a black dress with metal beads, complemented with a smile that reflected against her porcelain skin, each stud on her dress shining like stars against her cosmic grace. I remember everything about that night, but nothing as clear as her eyes.
C: The sights and tastes of our evening were only overshadowed by the sound of our conversation and the feeling of our clasped hands. When our hands connected there was an unspoken sense and feeling of safety, and for me, a new definition of home.
M: The night finishes in a blur of emotions and a kiss that created an equilibrium comprised of a sense of belonging every day since.
C: The next day, I inquired if there was anything planned for the day around the city…
M: Nope, just walking around.
C: I would later learn and link his love of surprises and playing cards. To him – both are not done in jest or simple fun, but instead approached as a “competition”… a man after my own heart…
M: In cards I battle my opponents and the odds using math. – For Surprises I battle time and emotions, using Chivalry, Romance & Love.
C: We began that day, much like we have most days since…

C: With coffee (Same time) M: With kisses (Same time)
C: Kisses* (Same time) M: Coffee* (Same time)
B: Coffee & Kisses

M: If we ever have a memoir – there’s the title
C: After coffee we walked aimlessly and happened to find ourselves at Bryant Park – who knew there were all these little shops, an ice skating rink, and coincidentally some of the best hot chocolate in the whole city!
M: Who knew? *Shrug innocently*
C: Sitting at the ice skating rink, holding hands is where it all
C: Started
M: Ended
C: Love
M: Searching
C: Equilibrium
M: Lies & Broken hearts
B: This was it
C: We “Aimlessly” (both do air quotes) wandered to Grand Central. Then up Madison Avenue
M: I can still remember where it happened – between 53rd and 54th street – the path we had seemed to just start on crumbled under me and I lost my footing. Maybe it was the way I felt at home by her side, maybe it was her smile reflecting the beauty of her heart, or maybe it was that she liked the vanilla half of the black and white cookie we just got from Juniors Bakery – either way, my heart cashed in a winning lottery ticket that day. She probably assumed the cold air was making my eyes water but it was the wind rushing against my face as I fell, in love with her.
C: He did have a twinkle in his eye as we walked that seemed to whisper the words (whisper) “just wait”. Then, we “happened” upon Bonhams – there, a memento of a movie which is one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES! Dorothy’s ruby red slippers! After that, we passed by all the shops heading up town, stopping in Tiffany’s flagship store. My first chance to surprise HIM with something – go big or go home…Later I surprised him with the Tiffany’s bengal I had bought him – he was so shocked and touched that he teared up and said:
M: Thank you so much – I love it.
C: He put it right on and made the promise:
M: I won’t take this off my wrist until there is a wedding band on my finger.
C: A promise – despite how cute and hopeful and painful it sounded at the time – he kept.
M: (Shows wrist)
C: My third wish was to experience and feel something different, or that I hadn’t ever had the opportunity to feel before. My third wish, though inevitable in our trajectory, was also the hardest to deal with.
M: The next day – she had to go home. Her departure’s nature was in stark contrast to the splendor and perfection of the weekend. “Bitter-sweet” hardly summed it up.
C: I left with barely a goodbye (Same time)
M: She left with barely a goodbye (Same time)
C: I couldn’t say goodbye, if I turned around and said it he would see that my eyes were filling with water. As I rode in the cab to the airport, I noticed the bitter cold that I seemed oblivious to all weekend.
M: My own tears came as I watched her
B: Leaving (crystyl lead into next line)
M: Me Behind…
C: …a trail of breadcrumbs made of exhaust fumes, tears, energy, & warmth I had been filled with all weekend
M: That was still
C: To this day
B: The hardest goodbye we’ve ever had.
C; It’s been a long day, without you my friend and I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again. We’ve come a long way, from where we began, Oh I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again, when I see you again
M: With each breath we shared we felt more alive – for the first time in my life I wasn’t taking steps from the beginning to the end but instead from life to living.
C: And with our progression towards truly living our lives, life itself began approaching a state of balance.

M: Like the first time we met each other’s mother – Just the right amount of Love,
C: Caring
M: Avocados
C: and foooooooood.
M: Both mothers had a similar amount of maternal love
C: Matched familial pride, and just the right amount
B: Of Crazy

M: My first Mama Swanson encounter taught me that Southern Hospitality is as real, filling, and rich as their cooking. It taught me that smiling really is contagious – all of her daughters seemed to catch hers – And lastly, it taught me that there is most certainly a right and a wrong way to cut an avocado – I’d been doing it wrong the whole time! Haha But what I learned pales in comparison to what I felt. I felt welcomed, I felt loved, and I felt home – a feeling foreign to me outside the walls of the house I grew up in.

C: I remember my first trip to the Cohen house and my first time meeting Mama Cohen. Italians have a lot in common with Southerners – sure, our hair is a bit bigger, our speech a little slower and clearer and our accents more appealing, but the conversational differences were hardly noticeable… until we sat down to eat. I realized that some of our phrases just didn’t translate. Sure, you have the common tongue differences like “Y’all vs. You guys” and Pop vs. Soda – both pretty normal. But apparently in Italian or “New York English” the phrase “Yes please I’d love some” translates to “I WILL NEVER EAT AGAIN SO PLEASE MAKE THIS COUNT…” I didn’t come close to finishing my plate – Mama Cohen made sure to fill my tummy, I later understood that this is her clearest expression of love and the theme, we can just say, is NO LEFTOVERS, ever. . In her house, the glass is never seen as half-empty. No. Seriously – you’d have a better chance of having two full glasses and a side of pasta than a half-empty glass.

M: Our parents are the cartographers of our journey in this life – which is why I had to ask the Map-Maker of the most beautifully chartered structure my eyes will ever see – if she made room when she first designed that map, for someone like me.
C: He asked my mom if he could ask me to be his girlfriend and even though I thought it was a bit whimsical, I secretly loved it
M: She said yes.
C: Maybe he was the key
M: She put me in the key (brief pause)

C: To my heart (Same time)
M: To her heart (Same time)

C: We saw each other as often as possible. Playing cards most times we were together – but the next Ace up Mike’s sleeve was being held until Valentine’s Day.
M: It was going to be perfect – puzzles, poetry + surprises. I would fly down and surprise her
C: I knew he was coming
M: I would send her a puzzle with our picture on it correlating to a piece I wrote her
C: The delivery guy never came
M: The poem would be about us being the missing pieces to each other’s puzzles
C: We couldn’t put the puzzle together
M: I would get picked up from the airport and “Surprise” (Crystyl does air quotes) Crystyl with flowers and get her ready for the dinner reservations I had made.
C: I had to pick him up. It was very sweet but unnecessary – I just wanted to see him.
M: The weather was bad on February 14th 2014 and my flight was delayed – a lot. I wouldn’t be able to get there in time, I wouldn’t be able to get us to dinner, no one would be able to get me at the airport, Everything was ruined! I had to tell her I was coming.
C: I didn’t know what was cuter and more endearing – the amount of planning he’d put into this day or how upset he was that it wasn’t perfect. I told him “Don’t you worry, Don’t you worry child – heaven’s got a plan for you – Don’t you worry Don’t you worry now – oooooh”
M: I told her I wasn’t worried. And I wasn’t. I was destroyed. I couldn’t explain it to anyone either, but by not delivering her my approximation of heaven, I feared my Angel might get home-sick, and leave.
C: This unnecessary, but truly heart-felt, sentiment would scrawl the insignia of chivalry on this Hopeless Romantics Coat of Arms – representing the genuine nature of our love.
M: And as time passed we felt more alive and even more together.
C: Like the foundation of any structure that lasts a life-time, it has seen weathered storms, but it has also witnessed sunshine and blue skies. One of those lovely days that further settled the structure of our love was my performance in Bat Boy.
C:”Lean on me,
when you’re not strong
And I’ll be your friend
I’ll help you carry on
For it won’t be long
‘Til I’m gonna need
Somebody to lean on” (keep singing, trail off during next line)
M: It was the first time I ever saw her perform AND the first time the Cohen and Swanson parents ever met. The foreshadowing was unknown but monumental. Our families met, Crystyl performed and love was abundant. When you mix all of these pieces together, fracture them and reflect them them back – you could say it was being foreshadowed in…. a Kaleidoscope? (Shifts eyes and raises eyebrows)
C: I see what you did there, not going to fall for it
M: Like a Kaleido….
C: Nope, not going to fall for it. It reminds me of the way you tricked me at the show,- I was so caught off guard that I didn’t even notice as I first said “hi”. My brain took an extra few seconds to realize, oh my goodness~! Mike’s parents FLEW DOWN from NYC to come to my show!
M: Surprise – Completed. It helped me to further appreciate the relationship between our love, and music – a circle of support, allowing us to show each other how much we care…
C: We are always listening
M: Or singing
C: Something. We have a wide taste of music but we have enjoyed sharing our appreciation of it, and each others. (Looks at Mike menacingly)

C: “Okay can I just say something crazy?”
M: I love crazy
C:All my life has been a series of doors in my face, when suddenly I bump into you
M: I was thinking the same thing! ‘Cause like
I’ve been searching my whole life to find my own place
And maybe it’s the party talking or the chocolate fondue
C: But with you (Loud)
C: I see your face – and it’s nothing like, I’ve ever known before –
C: Love is an open door
C: Love is an open…. door “ “ “

M: And so we decided to share an open door together, and Crystyl moved up to New York City. It was an amazing time of new experiences
C: Food
M: Sight Seeing
C: Food
M: Shows
C: And Food! We ate SO much good food
M: yes, and food.
C: We aren’t your standard couple, we both are held together by intangible forces that wecall – Trust
M: Respect
C: Honesty
M: and Communication
C But the common ground I cherish the most is the very direction and appreciation of life
M: (Whispers and does air quotes) “Vectors”
C: Like playing cards
M: Food
C: Music
M: And laughter. So much laughter. So pure and typically at ourselves or each other. Like when she says something like,
C: “fo shizzle”
M: in public, then gets nervous that she just said that – haha.
C: Fo shizzo! Or how he sometimes does this cute and funny baby talk and batting of his eyelids
M: Cwyyyystooooooooow…. I don’t do dat… just like your shoulder dance
(Crystyl does shoulder dance)
C: And your hips!
(M does hip dance)
C: And we realize that as a whole, we are greater than the sum of our parts.
M: Despite being very emotional, I’m also mathematically inclined and often times reflect in amazement that she and I are each one, but combined we are more like 3…. point one four.
C: No….
M: 159…
C: No!!!
M: 2653585 –
B: It’s Pi!
M: It’s infinite and incalculably valuable
B: Like our love

C: And what followed next on our journey together was just like any other relationship. We decided that we should take a vacation to the D.R.we’d invite our parents so that they could get to know one another… or so I thought.
M: So many things to plan but traditional family values told me there was one of paramount importance – I would ask permission to let Crystyl’s beauty light my sky as long as I lived.
C: Why you gotta be so rude? / Don’t you know I’m human too / Why you gotta be so rude / I’m gonna marry her anyway
M: I got this…
C: (fast) IN the REAL world, my dad and Michael, dropped me off at my hair appt and were left to their wiles.
M: This was all about timing. So, I waited, until the exact right timeexactly when Crystyl closed the car door. I looked at John, right in the eyes, and steering wheel and windows, and I said, ‘can I ask you a question?’ Long story short, I asked, and he said (shake your head no) YES! I told him, I would like to cook dinner for the family. We picked up the fixin’s for mac and cheese and went home to celebrate over a bloody mary. We celebrated it, 8 times.
C: I could have guessed that – he came into the salon when he came to pick me up. It was like watching a care bear in a store full of rainbows and pillows. (M acts out the hair touching. C looks at audience) What were they doing?
M: I’m cooking dinner
C: And so he did – I watched him measure and stir ingredients – milk, cornstarch, butter, salt, pepper – the smell was… intoxicating (said with jest) so I decided to try his rue, (licks spoon then looks at Mike) Hey babe…this doesn’t taste quite right..
M: It’s not done yet Crystyl…
C: No I think something is wrong, it’s really sweet
M: Well duh, I didn’t add the cheese yet… (shakes head mockingly)
C: I would just try it fi…
M: Cryswwwstoooowww
C: He adds the cheese AND THE BLUE CRAB, then tries it, and he made a face like a baby eating a lemon. Now imagine that baby made the lemon… and was drunk. He was so upset and I couldn’t understand why or begin to comprehend the emotions behind this moment in time for him. But more-so, I couldn’t figure out – what happened to the mac n’ cheese? It was REALLY sweet! Upon looking at the ingredients a wave of understanding rushed over me… there on the counter was the cornstarch, empty bags of cheese, pepper and the sweet n’ low – I realized what had happened and the only reason I didn’t burst out laughing was because I could see he was-
M: Mortified, beyond upset at the ruined momentis of the situation, and, yes, drunk. So I did what any reasonable, self-respecting, drunk man does when he makes a mistake that feels cataclysmic in nature…
C: He went upstairs and cried.
M: (nods approvingly)
C: I would only later find out why this little hiccup felt more like a life upheaval for him – at the time however, it was settled with some reassurance, a call/text to Lauryn, a little love, and
Taco Cabana.
M: And there I found three relative constants for supporting and uplifting me – Crystyl’s reassurance, her love, and Tex-Mex.
C: And your sister, sushi, cuddles and Huney…
M: Touche…. But there were important things for me to focus on – we had a trip coming up: both sets of parents, a tropical vacation, the woman I already knew I wanted to spend the life with? Yeah, this was going down! *softly* fo shizzo* I spend a great deal of time navigating the rapids in this delta between Decision & Action.
C: This delta was 3+ months long though – and any time I would even seemingly get an inkling of where those winding waters were weaving he would make waves.
M: This was to be the biggest surprise I’d ever plan – so yeah, maybe sometimes I’d start a fake argument to cut her premonitions off.
C: sometimes, more like daily?
M: But our love remained and remains an ocean – unerringly STABLE.
C: And we flew over an ocean for our first and last tropical vacation as girlfriend and boyfriend. The Dominican Republic was our cocoon…
M: Unlike the secrets held with a cocoon, our transformation from she & I to “we” was visible, tangible, and as always, hysterical.
C: This event was set up masterfully, like a (hands up in To Be or Not to Be position) Shakespearean PLAY.
M: No – not Romeo and Juliet – more like “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”
B: I learned two things that day:
M: One – things will always work out the way they’re supposed to, luckily with Crystyl – they tend to be beautiful and full of love.
C: One – Always expect the unexpected, Hopeless Romantics have a way of catching you unsuspecting and making you fall – even more in love with them.
M: Two – Mama Swanson is unquestionably the best body surfer I’ve ever seen. Ever.
C: Two – When I think something is up – it probably is.
M: I was so excited I had to keep busy or drinking the whole day my parents were flying in to meet us – with the ring.
C: I was so exhausted – my mom was out-drinking me, out-swimming me, and all around, out-vacationing me.
B: All I wanted to do was
C: Sleep M: Ask Her!

M: It was going to be amazing – we were going to “get pictures” of the six of us on the first night we were all together, at a gorgeous spot called Serenity Beach.
C: I get up from my nap to Michael picking out a beautiful dress for me to wear. I let my parents know to dress nicely as well for pictures. I told him he should just go over himself, I didn’t see what the big deal was – I was really tired!
M: My words whisked out of my mouth like the calm ocean breeze
C: He insisted I go – it was our first night all together with both sets of parents and we had reservations at a nice restaurant.
M: Inside, I was a MESS. I had been waiting for this moment for months, so long my head was about to explode.
C: Although I voiced my opinion that the sun would infact rise tomorrow, and perhaps that might be a better choice instead of tonight – Momma Swanson saved the day by declaring – “WE ARE GETTING THE PICTURES TAKEN TONIGHT CRYSTYL MARY SWANSON, NOW STOP IT.”

M: I’ve never wanted to high-five anyone more in my life.
C: This should have been my first clue
M: Let’s paint this picture – Crystyl – dress, Mike – button-up, Linda – dress, John – slacks and button up. Mom – sweats, Dad – shorts and a T-shirt.
C: Clue Number Two.
M: We were in a rush, no time for them to change – curse you time
C: We get to the beach, where the sun is getting ready to set. Michael sees a spot he wants to go for pictures. So we start walking towards it, *Start walking together*
M: Every time we look back our parents
B: (look right)
M: all act like we’re playing freeze tag
B: (look left)
M: or that we didn’t know they were following us.
C: Clue number three. We get to the spot and pose for a picture, Michael tells everyone
(Acting all this out)
M: I want a cute picture like this. (Goes behind her off to an angle)
C: This is so silly M: This is so cute

C: And as if a great secret were being shown to me I’m being faced out to sea, to stare at a very small Island

M: I know what to do.
C: I know what I should do
*Crystyl raises her arms up like the Titanic
*Michael gets down on his knee behind Crystyl angled off to the side so the audience can see and starts tapping Crystyl’s butt
C: Near, far,
M: Crystyl…..
wherever you are
M: Crystyl?
I believe that the heart does go on
M: Hey Crystyl??
C: Hold on, I’m making a joke
C: Once more you open the door
M: Ummm… Crystyl?
(Crystyl let’s out a frustrated sigh)
C: I was making a joke…
(Crystyl closes her eyes and Michael repositions off to the side but in front of her, then Crystyl opens her eyes in surprise – Michael gets up and smiles at Crystyl)

M: People claim the most beautiful words to hear is someone tell you “I Love You”. The most beautiful sound I have heard, until today, is when after some time of hugging and emoting, Crystyl looked me in the eyes and said “Yes”. You see, “I love you” has different meanings for different people, the word love, so powerful, but so vague in its comprehension. When you ask someone if they plan to one day make a promise that they will love you and stand by your side for as long as you shall live – those words, become the – second – most beautiful words you will ever hear.
C: YES!
C: The weight of those promises have helped to balance us, keep us steady, and allow us to be grounded through many interesting times.
M: Like when we vacationed with my family for that week and you donated your bathing suit bottoms to the ocean?
C: Or when you came to Texas for Christmas and we realized that you didn’t really know how to pick out a Christmas tree?
M: (whispers to audience) Thanks Tyler
C: Or that, even coming from a large Italian & Jewish family, having my whole family, in one house, with all the gifts being exchanged even you needed to take a step outside for some fresh air?
M: So true – so much fun, so much excitement, so much – so muching!
C: It was at the beginning of 2015 that I decided I wanted a piece of home up in New York City, and Mike, well, Mike loves cuddling and dogs – and so – we brought Huney up to live with us.
(Pictures of Huney on the screen)
M: It’s been a tough transition for her
(Picture of Huney passed out on the couch)
C: As well as it has been of us
(Picture of Crystyl and Huney cuddling next to Picture of Mike and Huney cuddling)
M: The face of struggle….
C: Huney has done many things to help solidify, level-out, and cement our relationship, but none more important than making obvious a Theory that we have had of our Love.
M: We have stated that
B: (doing the sign language L-O-V-E)
M: Living Objects have Vectors of Equilibrium
C: We are most certainly alive, L-iving O-bjects (sign letters)
M: As we’ve shown, the direction of our lives are most certainly heading to the same place. V-ectors (sign V)
C: For humans, the thought of “Harmony” is very subjective, but to animals, Harmony is more a matter of instincts
M: It would be safe to say then that a dog would be a great judge of when someone, or something (points to both Crystyl and himself) when it’s perfect.
(Picture of Huney totally comfortable or asleep between us)
C: As objectively as we can be, we’re all confident in validating the balance we have found with each other, and our Love. E-quilibrium (sign E)
M: Our Theory of Love is no different than that of Einstein’s and gravity
C: You can’t see it, you can’t touch it, and although it might not always be at the forefront of your mind, you can always feel it’s impact.
M: And as Einstein had the Institute of Advanced Study to validate his theory, we have the state of Texas,
C: And our dear friend and personal cupid – Curtis.
M: So we asked Curtis to close the loop he had opened for us and officiate our wedding, starting the same way I did when deciding to ask Crystyl to marry me…
Curtis: With permission – so, I ask, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?”
J: I do
Curtis: And with that blessing would the Attendants please join us? Crystyl & Michael – today you celebrate one of life’s greatest moments and give recognition and praise to A Theory of Love – a Theory created in Love, by Love, to show the worth and beauty of your Love, as you join together in the vows of marriage.
Michael, do you take Crystyl to be your Wife?
M: I do
Curtis: Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect her, forsaking all others and holding only unto her?
M: I do
Curtis: Do you promise to have and to hold her, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from this day forward until death do you part?
M: I do
Curtis: Crystyl, your turn
M: And if you were wondering earlier why Crystyl saying “yes” to marry me is the second most amazing sound I’ll ever hear, it’s because this is the first…
Curtis: Crystyl, do you take Michael to be your Husband?
C: I do
Curtis: Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto him?
C: I do
Curtis: Do you promise to have and to hold him, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, from this day forward until death do you part?
C: I do
Curtis: I don’t think anyone here would find surprise in the fact that you have both decided to write your own vows. Who would like to go first?

*Plays rock paper scissor – we can decide ahead of time who wins or not if you want*

Crystyl Vows
Michael Vows

Curtis: Crystyl and Michael, in-so-much as the two of you have agreed to live together in Matrimony and have promised your love for each other by these vows – by the authority vested in me, by the great State of Texas, I now declare you Husband and Wife. Congratulations, you may kiss the bride.

C: And like all great stories ours must come to an end – we have lived the individual tales that collectively created the prequel to the greatest love story we’ll ever know…
M: The one we get to live together. Thank you for watching our story begin.
END: