Good morning – if you’re in the North-East it is a lovely morning indeed – I hope you got to step out and catch some Vitamin D. I’ve been teaching spin recently (a lot) and it’s helped me run into all walks of life and some truly amazing and unique people. One of the things I’ve been running into here in NYC more than anywhere else I’ve lived, is the 30-something year-old woman who has two (or more) jobs – her main job(s) and dating.
I get it, we all want to find that special/right someone. I also understand that certain areas are harder than others – people have a misconception that because there are so many people in NYC it’d be easier to find someone (or “the” one) – annnnnnnnd they’d be wrong. Mostly.
It’s like finding a song you love – you can use Spotify, or Soundcloud, or iTunes, 22Tracks, etc. and what most of these services do is take a song you already love and match up tracks that they think you’d like due to similarity / artist / etc. Now imagine you signed on and Spotify said, “Hello Awesome User – here’s all 26 Million songs we have in our database, enjoy.” It’d be overwhelming and hard to find what you REALLY wanted.
This is what dating, particularly online, has become for most. So let’s take the streaming-music-services approach here. Instead of trolling through endless profiles and left-swipes – I propose you actually just stop looking! Instead, focus on 1 or 2 things in your life that you absolutely love doing. And submerse yourself in it – commit yourself to it – own it – love it. Through your own passions, you will find people who ACTUALLY share similar ones (not just post it as a word on their profile or a buzzword at the bar).
The best advice I ever got was to just do me, enjoy myself and my life and everything else would fall into place. The harder you look, the more frustrating the journey, and if nothing else, this amazing and beautiful life you have is nothing but a journey. Enjoy the experience, don’t dread it.
You are amazing just the way you are. The things you love are just as important to other people (not all, but some). And your mutual love and passion for your unique journey in this life is what will find you true love at the end of the day.
For now, smile. Take a look in the mirror and be proud of who you are. Every day you wake up is another day on your journey, another step towards a better, wiser you, and another step in what can only be the right direction – there’s no going backwards.
Have a fantastic week.