Good morning! I hope you’re having a great start to your week already. And I truly do hope that for you – and let’s talk about that for a second. Not your great week, but about hope. And more specifically hope how it relates to expectations. I’ve found a disconnect lately in my own life as well as several friends of mine, as it relates to their expectations vs. their hopes and that continually blurred line between them.
My easiest distinction has to do with emotional reactions – “hope” is an unstated desire and shouldn’t result a negative reaction if it whatever you’re hoping for doesn’t come to fruition. “Expectations” are stated/discussed, not implied, and can cause that negative reaction.
We all have expectations, and there’s nothing wrong with that – it’s just when we let our expectations dictate our emotions or reactions to things that sometimes we get led astray. Have you ever had a moment where you shared something with a person close to you and their reaction just wasn’t quite what you expected? They weren’t as supportive as you hoped they’d be, or they weren’t quite as ‘on your side’ the way you’d hoped they be? We’ve all experienced this – this is an example of a mis-placed expectation.
Example: If you discuss with your significant other that it means a lot to you when they compliment how you look when you get done-up, and makes you feel sad or ‘less-than’ when they don’t even seem to notice – for whatever reason you have (totally fine regardless) – then you are setting the expectation for that person. And when you get all done-up next it is on them to live up to that expectation or not to, knowing full-well the potential negative consequences of them not doing so.
However, in the same situation, if you haven’t told them ahead of time that this is important to you and had that discussion, it is hard to get upset at them for not telling you (again) that you looked gorgeous when you got all done-up (which, btw, you did 🙂
Be mindful of this in life – if someone is making you feel negatively because they are not reacting or responding how you wanted them to, first take a step back and ask yourself – is this a hope of mine or was this qualified as an expectation – and if it wasn’t, then speak up! You always have a right to your feelings and to discuss them. You may not always _be_ right, but you certainly have a right to feel however you feel and to talk about ways to avoid or work through that.
I _hope_ you have a wonderful day, and I _expect_ that if you’ve read this far and have followed me this long, you know that I love you, no matter who you are. And as always; much love, smile on.